Caravan crash

What's more annoying than seeing a caravan on the road?  The answer:  Being held up in a two mile tailback because a caravan has crashed and blocked the road!

I honestly do not see the point of a caravan.  They aren't cheap, you waste thousands of pounds buying one for it to be stuck on your driveway, blocking out the light from yours and your neighbours windows. When you do decide to use it the tyres are more than likely flat, or the battery dead. Or you find that a local badger has burrowed into it as he's decided it looks like a nice place to sleep for the winter. Once you've sorted all those issues you, you discover you've got nobody to go away with because your wife has run off with the milkman, not wanting to be bored to death inside a caravan. your son / daughter has run away to Ibiza for fear of embarrassment. If you do decide to act a loner and go away in it by yourself you will More than likely find its turned into a force 12 gale, and the caravan will be thrown about like a blow up doll on a welsh farm if you were to risk it. All that, and for what?

When you do get to some caravan park, what is there to do?  "fill up the loo" was the answer given to Jeremy Clarkson when they tried it, and asked the question of "what do we do now we are here?" That trip resulted in having a bit of spam on a broken plate for breakfast, and the caravan ending up on fire.

This weekend is a bank holiday in the UK, and therefore there will be many caravans on the road heading to their fields of hell.  The most worrying thing of all is there they do not need to pass an MOT. So if you are following a caravan this weekend - just think about that.  At any time a wheel may fall off, burst, or the whole thing might collapse... and that's before you even start to think about the Muppet driving the car, pulling the caravan!

Caravans - nothing more than a bomb makers dream

As Bank Holiday nears in the UK all the people who have purchased a shed on wheels, because "they like that sort of thing" will be getting excited, blowing up their tyres, blowing up their imaginary wife, and checking their nuts are tight.

This then seems to be the thing to do if you have the sense of humour of a squashed fly and have nothing better to do that travel to the next county, blocking up the roads for all the normal people, and sitting in a field reading Caravan Weekly.

I really do not see the point of this. Caravans cannot be cheap, and what actually do you get out of it? Yes its a lot cheaper than going somewhere half interesting but there's a high risk of keeling over in a field by yourself from boredom.

TopGear tried out a Caravan holiday a few years ago and all that happened was they got lost, had a crash in a petrol station, and blew up the caravan because of a chip pan fire.  the woman who was a keen caravanner on site could only suggest they "fill up the loo" when asked what they were meant to do on a caravan site!

Caravans are no use, unless you are going to pack it with dynamite and light the fuse!

TopGear Filming on YouTube

In the last (not as in the last of all time obviously!) series of TopGear - Clarkson, May and Hammond tried to see if there was an alternative to the trains that we see today on our railways. 

Clarkson made a sports train out of a Jaguar XJ and a trailer, with a spoiler of course.  Hammond and May went the more sensible route with an Audi and some caravans. 

The usual calamities happened, with the caravans catching fire, and then being run over by a passing train.  It was a fantastic episode and full of all the things that people (most people anyway) love about TopGear.

Some filming has appeared on YouTube of this, taken by someone who was on a railways bridge watching.  The camera appears to have been held by someone who has the inability to use their hand, and has a severe case of caffeine shakes - but nonetheless, its great to see.  Check it out below

Electric cars

Topgear did a great section on electric cars last week - in which the outcome was that if you wanted to spend £30k+ on a car that takes you to the corner shop and back, and then needs charging for 13hrs - you should get one.  Also there aren't any charging points on the road network, and the only place you can charge them is off you own home supply.  I would imagine that by the time electric cars are popular, the price of electricity will be double that of petrol and diesel right now - so what is the point?

Today BMW have apparently been doing some research into electric cars.  They provided an electric mini to members of the public for a period of time, and they have been pleased to announce that 93% of the people who took part would buy an electric car, and most of them would this year.  Out of the 5 people, it would seem that 4 people live upstairs from the corner shop then. Why would you buy a car that will only get you around 100 miles, and cost you a bomb in electric bills?

Topgear also found that the engine and battery packs would last a max of 10 years, probably 5. What can you use the car for after 5 years? A secondary battery for your calculator?

The city of Loughborough where Clarkson and May came to halt in due to low batteries have said today that they are installing two free electric outlets so that they can come back and charge their cars.  No offence to this idiot, but do i have to spell out the obvious? Clarkson isn't THAT interested!!

Once the cars can actually do 500miles at least on a charge, the outlets are as common as fight in a Manchester bar, and the price of running the cars are half that of Petrol or Diesel - then please do come and tell us all about it.  In the meantime, don't insult us with your claims that people (probably BMW employees) would buy one now.