How Do I Change a battery in a Ford Focus?

"How hard can it be?" you say?  Well... not as easy as it could be - is the answer.  This is best done by two people. However - I would recommend not to employ some spanners from Halfords to do it! Here are the steps on how to do it yourself

1. Find your radio code - if you don't have it, then once you change the battery you will be soundless!
2. Unclip the top of the battery container (only one clip) and the side clip
3. get a 10mm socket and loosen the nuts around the terminals. Be careful not to loose them, or you will be screwed.
4. The metal harness securing the battery in the car is held on by a 10mm nut which is down the side of the battery container, A little hard to get at, but not impossible once you part the container a little. Again, be careful not to loose this nut!
5. Unclip the metal harness
6. Take off the terminals - you may need to lever the negative terminal off with something, a spanner or screwdriver will do it. You can also buy terminal pullers to make it easier.
7. Take out the battery (easier with two people)

8. Insert new battery
9. If its slightly smaller in length you will have to position it so the wires that connect to the ECU fit ok when the battery container is secured.
10.Reattach the terminals and tighten the nuts
11. Replace harness and tighten nut to secure
12.clip back the battery container covers

If you follow the above you should be done in about 20 mins!

Changing a tyre with a fork?

This morning i came across an interesting sight. It was truly one of those things that you would never expect to see. Right up there with the news of Tony Blair having a sex change operation, and his wife Cherie looking attractive! It just won't happen!

I passed a car this morning who had had a puncture and was at the side of the road. Nothing out of the ordinary here.  BUT... on closer inspection the person trying to change the wheel was not using a wheel nut tool. they were using a fork!!! A standard steel cutlery set type of fork!! I presume therefore that they had used the wheel nut tool to eat a philly cheese steak, or in some other way got the two things confused. what other possible reason could there be?  I would have stopped to offer assistance, but i was too busy laughing.  Thinking about it, i should have offered to provide a desert spoon and a knife, to complete their set!

I would guess they are still at the side of the road now. I will let you know tomorrow if they are, and the resulting amusement!

What a crazy world!

Another slow driver! Arrrghhhh

Here's an example of one of the many slow drivers i have to deal with everyday!! 

doing 30 / 35- mph max on a 60mph road. The weather was fine, it was light and the road was otherwise very light on traffic!  You can easily do 70mph down this road.

Arrrrghhhh!!  More than likely just out for a Sunday drive, on an errrr Friday

I didn't go for an ovetake - in case you are wondering. There was some oncoming traffic!